Over the years, I have found myself in unhealthy or emotionally abusive relationships. It was confusing. My abusers were "nice people." They got along well with my family and one of them was even a therapist. For years I'd been aching to find my soulmate, only to find myself repeating the same patterns over and over again.
It wasn't until near the end of my last relationship that I was able to identify the pieces that were mine and those that were his. I learned that, as much as I wanted to help him heal, I had no ability to do so. Healing was his choice to make. Moreover, being with him meant having to choose his wellbeing over my own—a choice I was ultimately unwilling to make.
I left amidst a fire of the worst verbal and emotional abuse I had ever encountered, shoved everything I could into my car, including my dog and left. I was unemployed and had nowhere to go. So I lived "high-end homeless" with my dog in a hotel for 6 weeks.
To ensure that my leaving would, this time, be permanent, I moved an hour away to a place I loved. I found a place to live, a job, and gradually built a wonderful community of friends. Since that day, I have done a tremendous amount of healing and have found so much joy in my life! I have even learned to love myself more, (which I didn't even know was lacking!) and it has changed EVERYTHING. I also developed a much stronger, personal connection with my Higher Power and have learned to trust and follow my intuition. I feel like I am living life on a whole new level!
I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I was put here on this earth to share what I have learned with other women who need and want to hear it and am BURSTING with learned lessons and insights to share!
As a self-expressionist, I mean that I love sharing my concepts and ideas with others through speaking, writing, and performing in general. In my spare time, I love to dance, belt out 80s rock songs at karaoke, make art and photograph nature. Creativity is a very big part of who I am and it is how I show love to myself and others.
I am also a growth catalyst in that, as I grow and heal, new concepts come to me in the form of "books" that are fully formed in my head. I am currently working with a publisher to write my book called, Why Smart Women Stay and How They Can Leave Once and for All ™ and teach a course with the same name.
I am also 30,000 words into writing my own memoir called I'm Not Gonna Make It, (But I'm So Glad I Did!™). ™ Because, like many people, I have found that memoir writing can be a profoundly healing and inspiring experience, I teach others how to write their own memoirs - both from a literary perspective (with 30 years' writing experience) and a healing one (as a life coach).
As a "teacher" at my core and view everything I do as teaching, be it writing; empowerment life coaching; teaching courses, workshops or retreats; or speaking. I believe it's my life purpose to share my insights and encouragement with others so that they, too, may feel inspired to heal. I love to teach others what I, myself, am learning.This keeps my courses, speaking engagements, and talks exciting and fresh and means that there will always be more to come!
The inspiration junkie in me comes from my being inspired by other peoples' journeys toward personal growth. I have learned so much from people like Oprah, Maya Angelou, Brene Brown, Wayne Dyer, Iyanla Vanzant, Gary Zukov and other thought leaders. I enjoy reading inspirational memoirs such as The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls, Wild by Cheryl Strayed and self-improvement books like You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero. Basically, anyone who has faced substantial challenges, has worked through them and come out better for having healed through them is a huge inspiration to me—including my clients! On a personal note, I am also inspired by nature and am passionate about animals - particularly dogs and horses.
"Healing from abuse and trauma is difficult. Having such an incredible human being as Kari makes the journey seem attainable." Michele F.